Jayeless

I was procrastinating on some IS work, and hunting around my library for something to gaze at. I found a flow chart titled “Book Week”. “Oh, OK,” I thought, “let’s read it.” Unsurprisingly, the first item is “Books”. That makes sense. The next item is “Teachers”. Teachers do like people to read books, so that also makes sense. The third item? “Food”. Hey, wait — teachers are food?!

There is no year 12 history next year. We have failed, comrades.

I’ve been having pseudo “panic attacks” all evening. Why does it have to be September so soon? What did I do to deserve this? What obscene crime do I commit each August that warrants the retaliatory “quality time with the abusive mother” September that always follows? The knowledge of my impending doom just hit me today, and I cracked. I’ve calmed down with the assistance of some sleep-inducing chemicals (see title), but I’m afraid of what’s coming.

If you have some kind of birth defect in either of your ears (or both), for the love of everything you hold dear do not try to buy in-ear earphones. Well, you can buy them, but never ever try to use them. Why not? Untold agony, immense suffering, that kind of thing. You’ll never forgive yourself. Take it from someone who learnt the hard way.

Unlike last time, today’s Wordpress upgrade was smooth and almost painless. I wasted a considerable amount of time figuring out why asides weren’t appearing on the front page as they should have been. It was the fault of an incompatible plugin. Plugin deactivated, problem fixed. I’m relieved just to have not lost my entries again!

I live next door to a block of flats. The people living there are usually very transient, which is good, because the current lot is awful. Why can’t they let their five-year-old daughters have their screaming competitions inside the flat? Why do they tell them to go out and scream on the balcony, where they can disturb me? Why??

Mr Carpenter has had a long-running war with The West Australian, accusing the newspaper of deceptive and inaccurate reporting. What are you implying, Australian? That The West Australian isn’t deceptive and inaccurate? When I was in Perth, their idea of a fair and balanced article (not even on the “opinion” page) on the threat of a teaching strike was “Teachers’ union? Soviet Union, more like”…

During the Cold War, our great and powerful friend wanted to gas 200 Australian soldiers — with potentially fatal consequences — in the Queensland rainforest to see whether they would work against the Viet Cong, in the Vietnamese rainforest. Forty years on, the documents have been declassified, and Joel Fitzgibbon wants answers.

You see that “Archive” page? And you see how the tag cloud is now an actual cloud and not following the strange “one tag per line” rule that is Wordpress’s default? That would be because I fixed it. I don’t see why Wordpress’s developers thought “one tag per line” was a great system for a tag cloud in the first place, though.

Yes, I am alive. To prove this, I would like to draw your attention to a short article recently published by the BBC: Romania village elects dead mayor. The reasoning behind these votes appears to be as follows:

“I know he died, but I don’t want change,” one villager told Romanian TV.

Ah, BBC. Thank you for enlightening me with this useful information.