I’ve been having pseudo “panic attacks” all evening. Why does it have to be September so soon? What did I do to deserve this? What obscene crime do I commit each August that warrants the retaliatory “quality time with the abusive mother” September that always follows? The knowledge of my impending doom just hit me today, and I cracked. I’ve calmed down with the assistance of some sleep-inducing chemicals (see title), but I’m afraid of what’s coming.